So, I went rock climbing today. I am extremely afraid of heights and the wall was at least 60 feet high. I was so scared, but I was able to get to the top without looking down. Achieving that was the best sensation in the world. Being able to overcome my fears… it’s just a completely indescribable feeling from anything I’ve ever felt before. It’s like an adrenaline rush with this enveloping awareness of accomplishment that I never thought was possible.
Everyone always says that I’m so lucky and I don’t know why. They say it’s because I don’t have to deal with the drama that comes with being in a relationship and the only person I have to care about is myself. But their wrong. I’m not lucky. I don’t have anyone to hold hand with and say I love you to. I don’t have anyone to spend special moments with and call mine. I don’t have anyone to hug me and say everything is going to be alright when everything feels like it’s falling apart. I don’t have anyone to call me pretty even though I’m in a pair of sweatpants and a baggy t-shirt. I don’t have anyone to dance with when a slow song comes on. I don’t have anyone to make me laugh when I’m feeling down. The bottom line is, I don’t have anyone. Period. I’m alone…. and the last time I checked, there is nothing lucky about that…
